Ohmygodohmygodohmygodohmygod what do I do??? I saw a spider. I woke my dad up to kill the spider in the corner of my room right up by the ceiling, which he did, and all was disco. 5 minutes later the damn thing is up in the corner between the wall and the ceiling, this time a little closer to my window. I realize that I'm tall enough to stand on my bed and kill it if I can find a shoe that will wedge into the 90 degree angle of the corner...some Converse should do the trick, right? Wrong - I knock the thing down onto the bed I'M STILL STANDING ON, dive for the floor, and see the creepy 8 legged monster crawling all over my sheets before disappearing down the side of my bed that's facing the wall. Shit. I can't very well lean over and watch where it goes or he may crawl back up and try to eat me, obviously.

I give the bastard about 10 seconds while I regroup and figure out how to find him. My lamp! Beautiful - it has 2 light bulbs that I can turn on and use as a flashlight. I start shaking my covers and tapping the bed to see if Mr. Potential Death makes himself known...I don't see him anywhere on my pale sheets and blankets which is good, my bed is my turf, but bad. Mostly bad. He isn't on the wall. Can't see him on the bedframe...no sign of him on the carpet or anywhere underneath the bed. This is where I give it a rest and run to, strangely enough, my blog.

My only guess is that he's under my sheets and going to devour me in my sleep. I've made peace with that and will sleep somehwere else at least tonight, but I'll be damned if he gets my tempurpedic pillow. Time to swat the pillow, shake out the case, turn the pillowcase inside out and shake it, then replace it and relocate.

Why do spiders have to be so eerie? Seriously, can't they just have 6 legs and be insects instead? They're ugly, nobody likes them, and they could never pass for anything but creepy. And they eat those who they could probably make friends with, those bastards. I hate every last one of them. They can be small and harmless (and fast as the dickens), or they can be enormous and poisonous to humans and they equally spark the same reaction in so many arachnophobes.

YUCK! I have a spider in my bed and it's too late to strip it and change my sheets to find it. Every part of me itches and everything I see out of the corner of my eyes is a quickly moving little creepy crawly. Oh well, I suppose it's worse in countries where you live on a straw mat in a hut made of mud and banana tree leaves, right? That still isn't helping me fall asleep tonight though :(